Love you, Dad

What?  It’s 2011, are you serious?????

Man, did I lose a lot ot time lately.  Ever since Christmas, things have just simply overwhelmed me and I am deffinitely no longer on track.   Almost losing a loved on can do that to you.

Most of you know that I came close to losing my Dad over the holidays.  The days and nights were spent sitting at his bedside and wondering how life would go on without him.   I just lost my Mother three years ago on January 18th and was not willing to part with him just yet.  Thankfully, he had the same idea and pulled through with flying colors!  Like his doctor told me in ICU….. he’s one tough ole bird!  We were fortunate enough to celebrate his 81st birthday the day after he was finally released from rehabilitation and it was a milestone for him to say the least.

It started in November when he became ill with pnuemonia.  He just couldn’t seem to get over it after two rounds of anitbiotics and lots of rest.  Then on Christmas Eve, he was sick and couldn’t keep anything down.  I begged him all through the weekend to let me take him to the hospital, but to no avail.  Early Monday morning (12-27-10) he relized he needed help and called 911.  I called to check on him just after he made the call and met him at the hospital.  At first the doctor thought he had some kind of blockage in his stomach, but blood levels would later show that his white count was SEVERELY ellevated and told them there was major infection somewhere in his body.  They did a CT scan with contrast and learned that his gall bladder was rotten…..yes, rotten.

My Dad is getting older and has many health concerns to begin with.  He has had 4 heart attacks over the years, leaving the entire bottom half of his heart dead,  two strokes and only has one kidney.  It took them two days just to get him stable enough for surgery and even then, the doctors weren’t giving us much hope.  They found when they got in there that his gall bladder was poisoned and had leaked gangrene all through his system.  They explained to us that he would be on life support after the surgery and the chances for his recovery were slim to none. 

Needless to say, I was scared to death.  My Dad is my first love and I’ve always been somewhat of a Daddy’s girl and I just simply couldn’t wrap my mind around the thought of losing him.  I was there the morning they took him off of life support and all I could do was pray.  He amazed the doctors by adjusting right away!  That was  a miracle in itself.  On the 8th day after surgery, I signed him into a nursing facility for rehab to gain his strength back.  He fought like no other and was back home just 10 days later as opposed to the month or two the doctors were expecting.  He’s now getting on with his life again.  He’s back to walking every day and playing dominoes with his buddies at the mall and we can all breathe again.

It was one of the longest months I’ve ever lived in my life.  I stayed with him in the hospital and rehab almost around the clock to make sure he was taken care of in an adequate manor.  Sitting in a hospital chair for a month certainly did a toll on my health.  Once he was released, we closed up our house and went to stay with him for a week to help him out and then just like that, the doctor said he was good to resume his life, so I came home.

Having Lupus myself, stress is one of the biggest factors in triggering the disease and you can imagine what that month long ride did to me.  I ended up going for treatment myself twice in that month and am still not recooperated yet.  I’ve had so many steroids lately I look like a freak from the circus.  (for those who don’t know, they make you swell up and look distorted when you take strong doses like I do)  I just can’t seem to replentish my energy level now and the pain is unbearable these days.  I wouldn’t want him to know this, although he does know I had to go for treatment, he thinks I’m getting along fine now.  No need to worry him.  I pretend all is well and all that matters is him and his health, all the while wondering when this monster will let me get well again.

My family means everything to me and although this trip has almost done me in, I wouldn’t have changed a thing.  We find the strength to go on and with determination, can overcome any obstacle, even Lupus…..and I WILL overcome!   It will just take me longer this time than ususal.

Thanks for letting me whine and please, if you have loved ones that you don’t communicate with on a regular basis, take the time to visit or give them a call.  Let them know how much they mean to you while you’re still here.  One never knows when they won’t have the chance and I, for one, wouldn’t want to live with that regret.

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